the polar vortex is the least of your problems (Where is everybody?)

In Chicago, I heard that it's actually colder than Antarctica. On the news, the weatherman wasn't giving the forecast. He was just spooning the camera guy for warmth. --Jimmy Fallon

I heard experts say that during a polar vortex, you shouldn't leave items like beer, eggs, and medicine in your car, though if that's what you're keeping in your car, the polar vortex is the least of your problems. --Jimmy Fallon

Here's some good news, though. Federal employees returned to work this week. Yes. Though one woman says that when she got back to her office she had over 4,000 unread e-mails. Even worse, they were all from one employee who kept writing, "Where is everybody?" --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”