Well played, Canada

"Winner: Canada. Senator Ted Cruz was born in Canada, so while we were worried about Iran, China, and North Korea, a Canadian shut down the U.S. Government. Well played, Canada." -Seth Meyers

"Nine percent of Americans would give up their citizenship because of all the fighting in D.C. You know things are bad when people getting caught at the Mexican border are being sent back to America." –Jimmy Fallon 

Stephen Colbert explains the GOP strategy: "The rules are I go first, and I refuse to take my turn. And you can't take yours until I'm done. I know you're upset, but we're both at fault here, so let's negotiate. I agree to take my turn if you agree that I win."