He hasn’t been this happy since the day before Eric was born (stacking toads)

On Friday, President Trump received the inaugural FIFA Peace Prize after years of campaigning unsuccessfully for the Nobel Peace Prize. Might seem like an odd combination, but I think it’s appropriate because when you think peaceful, you think soccer fans.” — Stephen Colbert

“So they did something — you could call it genius and you might be right. They tapped into his disappointment from not winning the Nobel Peace Prize and created their own peace prize, the FIFA Peace Prize, which is like if NASCAR started handing out Peabody awards. It means nothing.” — Jimmy Kimmel

“I have to say Trump was so pleased. He hasn’t been this happy since the day before Eric was born.” — Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Are we taking the choo-choo or the beep-beep? (a statement telling the National Park Service to mind their own business)

“The National Park Service is asking visitors to please stop licking the hallucinogenic toads. The toads issued a statement telling the National Park Service to mind their own business.” —Jimmy Fallon

I saw that President Trump leaves for a 12-day trip to Asia tomorrow. It got off to a bad start when he asked, “How long is the drive? Are we taking the choo-choo or the beep-beep?” –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

The toads issued a statement telling the National Park Service to mind their own business (tear-away pants and a dog collar)

But this isn't the first time the White House has had trouble with a press pass. There have been sort of notable problems with that process, including in the Bush administration when they gave a -- regularly, gave a day pass to someone who turned out to be a male escort. They knew something was up when he was the only reporter wearing tear-away pants and a dog collar. --Jimmy Fallon

“The National Park Service is asking visitors to please stop licking the hallucinogenic toads. The toads issued a statement telling the National Park Service to mind their own business.” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

The toads issued a statement telling the National Park Service to mind their own business (a monopoly on truth)

“The National Park Service is asking visitors to please stop licking the hallucinogenic toads. The toads issued a statement telling the National Park Service to mind their own business.” —Jimmy Fallon

So, Michelle Obama actually had a nice time showing Melania Trump around, although it got weird when they walked into the Lincoln Bedroom and Melania said, “Wow, what a lovely closet.” –Jimmy Fallon

It just came out that Trump’s secretary of state, Rex Tillerson, was on the toilet when he found out Trump fired him on Twitter. Then Trump said, “Wow, what a coincidence — I was on the toilet when I tweeted that.” That’s right, Tillerson was on the toilet when he was fired. Which explains why Jeff Sessions and Betsy DeVos haven’t used a bathroom in six months. --Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

The toads issued a statement telling the National Park Service to mind their own business (Every little thing she does is magic)

November 2022

“Last night was not nearly as bad for Democrats as many thought it would be, starting with John Fetterman’s victory over Mehmet Oz in the closely watched Pennsylvania Senate race. Wow, I can’t believe a candidate with no government experience who lives in New Jersey and reportedly killed over 300 dogs lost a race for Senate in Pennsylvania.” —Seth Meyers

“Bitcoin stocks keep crashing. Right now Bitcoin is worth about as much as a Dr. Oz yard sign.” —Jimmy Fallon

“The National Park Service is asking visitors to please stop licking the hallucinogenic toads. The toads issued a statement telling the National Park Service to mind their own business.” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”