She's a toddler with a gold medal (He forgot it was pizza bagel night)

"Over in the Middle East, Saddam Hussein's hunger strike is 

officially over. Saddam went on a hunger strike Thursday 

morning to protest the murder of his lawyer. They brought 

him lunch and he refused. And then dinner came and he ate. 

He forgot it was pizza bagel night." –Jimmy Kimmel

It's tricky for journalists to write about Caitlyn Jenner, because 

she was a 65-year-old man, now she's a 2-year-old woman. She's 

a toddler with a gold medal, which is impressive. –Jimmy Kimmel

 

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It's an exciting time to be in the commemorative plate business (No wonder he's confused)

"It's all part of this immigration reform bill that they're working on to help us forget how much we don't like them in Congress. President Bush was in Arizona checking out plans for this new fence he's building. They really should let him actually build the fence. Give him a shovel. I think he'd be good at that. But, he's a busy man, the president. He's juggling immigration and tax cuts. He's listening to our phone calls. He's got the war. He's got other wars he's planning." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Between the death of bin Laden and the royal wedding, it's an exciting time to be in the commemorative plate business." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Saddam Hussein has been on a hunger strike for seventeen days. They had to nurse him back to health with a feeding tube to get him healthy enough so he can go back on trial. And then be put to death. It is an odd thing. Two years ago, we were dropping ten thousand pound bombs on the guy. Now we're feeding him nutrients through a tube. No wonder he's confused." --Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

This is the most embarrassing thing to happen to the Bush administration -- today (coming up with a believable story)

 

"Tom DeLay will still get to collect over a million dollars in congressional pension money. This is what's so great about Congress. It is the only place in the world where robbers get to keep the money." --Jay Leno

"As you know, Hillary Clinton is now blaming her embellishment of her Bosnia trip on lack of sleep. See, that's the difference between Hillary and Bill right there. After a night of no sleep, Bill never had a problem coming up with a believable story." -- Jay Leno

"The deputy secretary for the Department of Homeland Security was arrested after he tried to seduce a 14-year-old girl online, who was actually an undercover detective. I think the terror alert has been raised to creepy. Homeland Security? We need home room security. This is the most embarrassing thing to happen to the Bush administration -- today." --Jay Leno

 

"Saddam Hussein ended his hunger strike after just one missed meal. I think he finally realized a hunger strike only works if people don't want you to die." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It is the only place in the world where robbers get to keep the money (special needs cowboy)

"The MTV 'VMAs' last night were hosted by Russell Brand. He hosted their 'Video Music Awards,' and he referred to President Bush, and this caused a big controversy, as a 'retarded cowboy.' Yeah, of course, everyone knows the correct term is 'special needs cowboy.'" --Conan O'Brien

"Tom DeLay will still get to collect over a million dollars in congressional pension money. This is what's so great about Congress. It is the only place in the world where robbers get to keep the money." --Jay Leno

"Saddam Hussein ended his hunger strike after just one missed meal. I think he finally realized a hunger strike only works if people don't want you to die." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

the most embarrassing thing to happen to the Bush administration -- today (hookers, mistresses, interns)

"Saddam Hussein ended his hunger strike after just one missed meal. I think he finally realized a hunger strike only works if people don't want you to die." --Jay Leno

"The deputy secretary for the Department of Homeland Security was arrested after he tried to seduce a 14-year-old girl online, who was actually an undercover detective. I think the terror alert has been raised to creepy. Homeland Security? We need home room security. This is the most embarrassing thing to happen to the Bush administration -- today." --Jay Leno

"This is why Republicans can't have sex scandals. They're just too creepy. The Democrats, they've got hookers, mistresses, interns -- not girl scouts!" --Jay Leno