“Donald Trump has already raised $5 million since the indictment dropped. Do you know how many cigarettes that’ll get you in prison?” —Roy Wood, Jr.
“You know Trump gotta be mad. He paid all that hush money, did nobody hush. But no affair has been less hushed than this one. Everybody knows about this damn affair. There’s uncontacted tribes in the Amazon who know that Trump boned Stormy Daniels. Trump’s arraignment on Tuesday in Manhattan, which would include fingerprinting and a DNA sample, with the Secret Service in attendance. That’s right, Trump’s gotta provide a DNA sample. Which if you think about it, it’s kinda how he got in this mess in the first place. The upside with Trump’s DNA is now the NYPD can probably solve a bunch of cold cases from the 80s.” —Roy Wood, Jr.
“Why are they arraigning him like he’s a normal person?Trump ain’t a normal person. Normal people don’t bring the Secret Service to get arrested. I feel sorry for the Secret Service agents, because you get assigned to a former president, and you’re supposed to be going to baseball games, windsurfing. You get assigned to Trump, you’ve gotta go to Rikers! You’ve gotta take a shank for this man, you’ve gotta taste-test the toilet wine and make sure it ain’t poisoned.” —Roy Wood, Jr.
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
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