I was gone for two years and nobody even noticed (they only come here if they’re already high)

April 2022

“Today, it was announced that Vice President Kamala Harris has tested positive for Covid-19. Yeah, President Biden told her to take her time recovering. He was like, ‘When I was V.P., I was gone for two years and nobody even noticed.’” —Jimmy Fallon

“It’s Melania Trump’s 52nd birthday. Birthdays are tough for Melania – she’s made the same wish for the past 20 years, and it never comes true. The tears keep extinguishing the candles before she can blow them out. I don’t know what kind of gift Trump gave her, but he did send her a beautiful email today that started ‘dear supporter.’ Birthdays are depressing for a lot of people. Can you imagine being Melania? Every year they sing happy birthday, then she spends the next 10 minutes watching the gibbon she married wolf down a whole cake.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“And officials in New York are reportedly considering a proposal to allow pizzerias and other restaurants to sell cannabis-infused foods. ‘Oh, they only come here if they’re already high’ – said Papa John’s.” —Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”