There's a lot of things I'd rather probe than Mars (He demanded the same deal as the cast of Friends)

McDonald's announced they would stop supersizing their french fries sometime in the next few months. The decision has already brought some health benefits. Fat people are running to McDonald's. --Conan O’Brien 3/5/2004

An employee at NASA's Mission Control announced he's bored with his job and has decided to become a porn actor. The NASA employee said, “What can I say. There's a lot of things I'd rather probe than Mars.” --Conan O’Brien 3/5/2004

I got some television news this week. The miniseries Jesus became one of the first shows ever to beat an episode of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. It's a big deal in television. And immediately afterwards Jesus renegotiated his contract and demanded the same deal as the cast of Friends. --Conan O’Brien 5/17/2000

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”