Apparently, up until this point, she's just been shoplifting (obedience)

Queen Elizabeth today learned how to use a self-service check-out at a supermarket's 105th birthday celebration. Apparently, up until this point, she's just been shoplifting. --Seth Meyers

Scientists claim to have succeeded transplanting a memory from the brain of one sea snail and implanting it into another. Or, more likely, snails live pretty similar lives. --Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Why do you hate diversity? (a two-second chase)

Breakfast Club star Anthony Michael Hall is facing seven years in prison for fighting his neighbor. However, his lawyer is trying to plea bargain that down to just serving detention with Molly Ringwald, Emilio Estevez, and Judd Nelson. –Conan O’Brien

This week federal officials entered a Wisconsin classroom and seized several giant African land snails because they're considered a health hazard. Officials rounded up the snails after a two-second chase. --Conan O’Brien 4/27/2004

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Green Eggs, Hold the Ham (a two-second chase)

For the first time ever a copy of Dr. Seuss's book The Cat in the Hat came out in Yiddish. They're also coming out with another Yiddish Dr. Seuss book called Green Eggs, Hold the Ham. --Conan O’Brien 3/16/2004

This week federal officials entered a Wisconsin classroom and seized several giant African land snails because they're considered a health hazard. Officials rounded up the snails after a two-second chase. --Conan O’Brien 4/27/2004

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

You know you're having a bad year when your birthday wish is to be back in a spider hole (Bush asked if he can sit on Dick Cheney's lap)

This week federal officials entered a Wisconsin classroom and seized several giant African land snails because they're considered a health hazard. Officials rounded up the snails after a two-second chase. --Conan O’Brien 4/27/2004

President Bush is receiving some criticism because tomorrow when he testifies before the 9/11 Commission. Bush is insisting that Dick Cheney be allowed to testify with him. Not only that he asked if he can sit on Dick Cheney's lap. --Conan O’Brien 4/28/2004

Big news ladies and gentlemen. It's Saddam Hussein's birthday today. You know you're having a bad year when your birthday wish is to be back in a spider hole. That is the good old days to him. --Conan O’Brien 4/28/2004

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

So, I guess that’s what passes for good news these days (Or, more likely, snails live pretty similar lives)

The CDC has announced that romaine lettuce is safe to eat again. So, I guess that’s what passes for good news these days. Romaine’s back! --Seth Meyers

IKEA’s launching a new credit card that offers rewards and perks for frequent customers, but it is a bitch to put together! --Seth Meyers

Scientists claim to have succeeded transplanting a memory from the brain of one sea snail and implanting it into another. Or, more likely, snails live pretty similar lives. --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”