So ladies: He’s single! (those ankles are totally airbrushed)

On Friday, a 112-year-old man was given the Guinness World Record for being the world's oldest living man. When asked how he achieved the record, the man said, “I jumped out and scared my older brother.” –Jimmy Fallon

Anthony Weiner’s wife, Huma Abedin, has decided to finally separate from him after his latest sexting scandal. So ladies: He’s single! –Jimmy Fallon

"Al Qaeda has launched its own women's magazine. I bought a copy, and I tell you right now, those ankles are totally airbrushed." –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

What happened to the last guy? (solidarity)

"Moammar Gadhafi made an appearance on television to prove that he is still alive. When he saw this, Larry King said, 'That proves nothing. I died 60 years ago.'" –Conan O'Brien

"Al-Qaida has not yet picked a new leader to run their terrorist organization. Apparently, candidates keep losing interest after asking, 'What happened to the last guy?'" –Conan O'Brien

Google has created several new emojis aimed at empowering women. So congratulations women, you asked for equal pay and you got five new emojis. –Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

they greeted each other like two action figures having sex (which I think is something Trump recommended as a cure for Covid)

Donald Trump visited East Palestine, the site of the recent train derailment. Several of the trains that derailed were carrying highly toxic vinyl chloride, which I think is something Trump recommended as a cure for Covid. —Colin Jost

Tucker Carlson, seen here at a White’s Only rave, has been granted access to over 40,000 hours of security footage from the January 6th riots. Watching all that will make you go insane, said psychiatrists about Tucker Carlson’s show. —Colin Jost

This week President Biden made a historic visit to Ukraine and met with Ukrainian President Vladimir Zelensky where they greeted each other like two action figures having sex. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”