"Rick Santorum won Alabama and Mississippi, and Mitt Romney won Hawaii and American Samoa. Here's a little mnemonic device to help you remember. Places you can get to in a Winnebago, go to Santorum. Places that require a jet or a yacht, go to Romney. Romney, of course, always does well with islands, that's where his money lives." –Jon Stewart
"You're not a Washington insider? You, the former Speaker of the House and Freddie Mac consulting millionaire, are the Washington insider. When Washington gets its prostate checked, it tickles you!" –Jon Stewart, on Newt Gingrich campaigning as a Washington outsider
“Alan Dershowitz, especially, marks an interesting case because of his stance against Bill Clinton during his impeachment in the 90s, though he’s not one to admit he was ever misguided; he recently said on Anderson Cooper’s CNN show of his stance then versus now, ‘I wasn’t wrong, I am just far more correct now than I was then.’ That is one of the most original lines I have ever heard in my life. And that’s a great line for a lawyer, but thank God this guy doesn’t work on a bomb squad. ’Don’t worry, we’re not going to die, we’re just going to be less alive.’” —Trevor Noah
I’m surprised the summit talks broke down in Vietnam. I thought Kim Jong Un and Trump had a good relationship. Even Trump said that he and Kim “Fell in Love.” I know that sounds weird but when you think about it, Kim Jong Un is totally Donald Trump's type. All of Trump’s best relationships are with people who are half his age and don’t speak English. --Trevor Noah
“At his press conference Trump played footage from Monday’s press conference but he refused to address what was achieved in February. It was a masterclass in dodging the question. He was two seconds away from pretending he doesn’t speak English.” —Trevor Noah
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
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