Last year, we got 1,200 bucks; this year, cloth and a rubber band (What the hell, Supremes?)

January 2022

“President Biden had a bad day. You know that vaccine mandate he rolled out last year? The one that required companies with more than 100 employees to get their workers vaccinated or tested regularly? Well, that was struck down by the Supreme Court today. The conservative majority ruled that Biden’s mandate went too far, and our individual right to get Covid from the worst person at work has been preserved.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“What the hell, Supremes? What — what do you know about large employers? You’re a small business with nine workers whose dress code is ankle-length Hefty bag.” —Stephen Colbert

“In an unsigned opinion, the conservative majority argued: ‘Although Congress has indisputably given Osha [Occupational Safety and Health Administration] the power to regulate occupational dangers it has not given that agency the power to regulate public health more broadly.’ But Covid is an occupational danger! Why do you think everyone who can is working from home? You think it’s because they want to see their spouse yell at the Roomba again?” —Stephen Colbert

“Well, guys, big news from Washington today as President Biden finally delivered a major update on his administration’s Covid response. Yeah, just like most phone updates, Biden kept hitting ‘ignore’ until he had no choice.” —Jimmy Fallon

“That’s right, we’re all getting masks. Last year, we got 1,200 bucks; this year, cloth and a rubber band.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Yeah, the N95 masks should be helpful. Unfortunately, out of habit, whenever somebody says, ‘N95,’ Biden calls out, ‘Bingo.’” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”