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Monday, November 4, 2019

al-Baghdadi issues/[expletive] measuring contest/Things we "Can Afford"


“Yeah, Trump was obsessed. You might say he had al-Baghdadi issues.” --Stephen Colbert
“You know how I know that killing bin Laden was a big deal? Because Barack Obama never had to say that killing bin Laden was a big deal.” --Stephen Colbert
“You don’t have to pretend this guy is a bigger get than bin Laden. First of all, it’s childish. Secondly, he’s not. All right? Bin Laden changed the entire world forever. It’s 18 years after 9/11 and I still can’t take four ounces of lotion onto an airplane.” --Trevor Noah
“But Trump is the only person who can turn a unifying occasion into a [expletive] measuring contest.” --Trevor Noah

“We looked at your 2000 book, ‘The America We Deserve,’ and you make a passing mention of bin Laden — who, in the book, you say Bill Clinton had already tried to kill. So you were predicting something that everyone already knew. [as Trump] ‘In my next book, I predict you’ll be hearing big things from this Taylor Swift individual.’” --Stephen Colbert

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


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