Well, you know what, the thing is, the human voice really reverberates from inside a tanning bed.” --Jimmy Kimmel
“Trump is a man who holds press conferences in front of a running helicopter, so I think you can hear him over a phone receiver. And if his best defense against impeachment is ‘I’m not loud,’ he’s gonna be in prison by Tuesday.” --Jimmy Kimmel
“Maybe because you’ve been watching phone calls. Try listening to them. [Imitating Trump] ‘No matter how wide I open my eyes, I couldn’t hear a thing. I might need glasses.’” --Stephen Colbert
“That’s just how old people talk into phones. They think every phone is like a ham radio during World War II: ‘Hello, is anyone out there? Are you receiving this message?’” --Seth Meyers
“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
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