Geoffrey the giraffe (and eating it anyway)

After going out of business last year, Toys "R" Us stores are coming back. When asked how he made a living while he was unemployed, Geoffrey the giraffe said, "You do not want to know." --Jimmy Fallon

And finally, I saw that later this month, Coca-Cola is releasing a new flavor -- orange vanilla. It's interesting. It's the first time anyone's combined orange and vanilla since Donald Trump and Mike Pence. --Jimmy Fallon

Here's some big news. It looks like Congress has reached a deal to avoid another government shutdown. That’s good. I don't know what I'm gonna do first, file my taxes or go to the DMV. I don't know. I'm just so excited. --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

No, he was more like unpaid intern (Democrats are begging it to run in 2020)

A picture of an egg became the most liked Instagram post ever with over 30 million likes. The egg is so popular, Democrats are begging it to run in 2020. --Jimmy Fallon

That's right, the government shutdown is now the longest in U.S. history. I'm not saying things are bleak, but right now, Washington, D.C., looks like an abandoned Toys 'R' Us. --Jimmy Fallon

It's not good. TSA agents aren't getting paid, and one of them said that morale is approaching "rock bottom." You can tell TSA agents are depressed 'cause when they see mouthwash in your carry on, they drink it. --Jimmy Fallon

There's another big story that came out, that back in 2017, the FBI started investigating whether Trump was secretly working for Russia. When asked if Trump ever worked for him, Vladimir Putin said, "No, he was more like unpaid intern." --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The saddest thing in American politics (since the day I was spawned)

I read that Toys"R"Us may be relaunching as a new store, called "Geoffrey's Toy Box." I guess executives were like, "How can we make ourselves sound more like a male strip club?" --Jimmy Fallon

Uh, guys, listen to this. A school administrator in Louisiana was just arrested after she showed up to school drunk during alcohol awareness week. To be fair, she did make everyone very aware of alcohol. --Jimmy Fallon

Next up is Texas Senator Ted Cruz. His closing statement is, "I've wanted to represent the great people of Texas since the day I was spawned."  --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

it is important to follow the money no matter how many porn stars it leads to (warehouse teeming with raccoons)

Yet another day of March Madness for the president: According to the “failing” New York Times, special prosecutor Robert Mueller has subpoenaed the Trump Organization, the president’s company, demanding that they hand over any documents related to business they may have done in Russia. In an investigation like this, it is important to follow the money no matter how many porn stars it leads to. --Jimmy Kimmel

I’ll always remember Toys R Us as the store where my children had a complete and total meltdown each and every time we went there. I guess people don’t enjoy that anymore. They buy toys on Amazon. Amazon will not rest until every other store is an abandoned warehouse teeming with raccoons. --Jimmy Kimmel

A magisterial collection.

An emotional roller coaster.

Soon to be a cult classic.

A combination of Bukowski’s

Last Night On Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

We've got our top man from I.T. to protect you (white giraffes)

Last night, Toys R Us officially filed for bankruptcy after falling $5 billion in debt. I guess they tried to pay it off, but the bank said, "This is Monopoly money." –Jimmy Fallon

I saw that today is International Talk Like a Pirate Day. And right before his speech, Trump's aides were like, "Please don't." (TRUMP) "Too late! Already bought the eye patch! ARHH you ready for a speech?" –Jimmy Fallon

I read that white giraffes were just caught on video for the first time ever. Researchers knew that they were white, cuz they were drinking pumpkin spice lattes. –Jimmy Fallon

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #Bernie2020 #FeeltheBern #repealreplacerepublicans