Say what you will about President Obama (And I looked it up. It's true.)

 

"I think you can tell that Rudy Giuliani is a little desperate because now he is saying that while he was mayor, New York City was never attacked by a giant lizard. And I looked it up. It's true." --David Letterman

"Celebrity birthday, Ross Perot, do you remember Ross Perot, ran for president a couple of times? 79 years old today, and still vital, vibrant and going strong. As a matter of fact, he received 9% of the vote in Iran." --David Letterman

"When you take George Bush out of his own environment, when you take him out of his own culture, like in Israel for example, he makes mistakes. Earlier today, he was speaking to a group of people in Jerusalem and he finished up by saying, 'I am Jewish guy.' There's no getting around it, George Bush is confused. He thinks a Jewish settlement is Ellen Barkin taking $20 million from Ron Perelman." --David Letterman

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It's an even tie between not Barack Obama and not Mitt Romney (Money Bags)

October 2012

"The second presidential debate is on tonight. President Obama is now saying he was too polite to Mitt Romney in the first debate. Obama now plans to address Romney as 'Money Bag.'" –Conan O'Brien

"One of President Obama's goals tonight is to win back female voters. Which explains why Obama is going to answer every question with a passage from 'Fifty Shades of Grey.'" –Conan O'Brien

"After Paul Ryan stopped by for a photo op at a soup kitchen, the head of the charity said Ryan did nothing. In other words, that man is ready to be vice president." –Conan O'Brien

"Ross Perot has endorsed Mitt Romney. This could help Romney get the vote of people you forgot were still alive." –Conan O'Brien

"The Obama campaign is releasing a new ad showing Americans whose financial situation has improved over the past four years. Unfortunately, the only person who appears in the ad is Mitt Romney." –Conan O'Brien

"Polling across the country shows the presidential race is now neck and neck. It's an even tie between not Barack Obama and not Mitt Romney." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They say as goes Honey Boo Boo, so goes the election

"After Paul Ryan stopped by for a photo op at a soup kitchen, the head of the charity said Ryan did nothing. In other words, that man is ready to be vice president." –Conan O'Brien



"Ross Perot has endorsed Mitt Romney. This could help Romney get the vote of people you forgot were still alive." –Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why they had a debate. This race was over last night when Honey Boo Boo made her official endorsement. She's pulling for Barack Obama. They say as goes Honey Boo Boo, so goes the election." –Jimmy Kimmel 

John Hulse painting