Now I know what it’s like to date Ted Kennedy (girl's night out)

In Beverly Hills this week, Michelle Obama had a girls night out with daughters Malia and Sasha. It's a switch. Usually when Michelle enjoys a girl's night out, it's with Barack. —Greg Gutfeld

Waymos has recalled nearly 4,000 robotaxis because of a glitch that caused the cars to drive into water. Soaked passengers say, "Now I know what it’s like to date Ted Kennedy.” —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Which really isn’t fair, because sometimes you can get rid of cancer (sink or f*cking swim pal)

A new study suggests that dogs notice and try to help when people are upset or in danger. Cats, on the other hand, think it's hilarious. --Seth Meyers

Republican hopeful Rick Perry this week compared Donald Trump to cancer. Which really isn’t fair, because sometimes you can get rid of cancer. –Seth Meyers

According to reports, President Trump is so unhappy with Attorney General Jeff Sessions that he is considering replacing him with former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani. That’s like being so unhappy with your wife that you’re considering replacing her with Rudy Giuliani. –Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

your wife would have her bags packed before you finished talking (Hindsight Is 2020)

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“You’ve got to give Trump credit. One crime isn’t enough for him. He’s always gotta do like five at once. He’s like a guy who steals a camcorder, sneaks into a movie theater without paying, illegally records and then sells the bootleg DVDs on the street, gets arrested, busts out of jail, and then holds a screening of the movie in a house he broke into.” —Seth Meyers

“Lev Parnas, a former associate of Rudy Giuliani who Trump has claimed not to know, brought receipts attesting to Trump’s knowledge of the removal of US ambassador to Ukraine Marie Yovanovitch in a deal for dirt on Biden. Parnas handed the US attorney’s office in New York secret taped footage of Trump telling Parnas to ‘get rid of her’, about Yovanovitch. ‘Get her out tomorrow. I don’t care. Get her out tomorrow. Take her out. OK? Do it.’ How is it possible that so many people have secret recordings of the president? I mean, this idiot has had more microphones and hidden cameras on him than Jim Carrey in the Truman Show.” —Seth Meyers

“When you have to say you’ve never met someone that many times, you’ve definitely met that person. Like if your wife asks, ‘Do you know Julia next door?’ and you said, ‘I don’t know her, never talked to her, don’t know who she is, or where she came from, or what she does. I’ve never spoken with her, I’ve never met, I’ve never had a conversation. Who is she? Why? I don’t know her.’ — your wife would have her bags packed before you finished talking.” —Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”