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Showing posts with label Guccifer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Guccifer. Show all posts

Thursday, June 8, 2017

I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears (crybabies)



According to reports, four top law firms have turned down requests from the White House to represent President Trump during the Russia investigation. Man, how guilty do have you to be when a lawyer won't even take your case? –Seth Meyers
Following salmonella outbreaks across the country, the Centers for Disease Control is urging chicken owners to stop snuggling with their birds. Though if you're snuggling with chickens, salmonella is, like, your fifth biggest problem. –Seth Meyers
A top-secret NSA report detailed Russian hacking efforts days before the 2016 election. Days before? Come on, Guccifer. That's poor planning. You can't leave your hacking to the last minute. Put some thought into it. No one wants an election you just picked up at Walgreens. –Stephen Colbert



Saturday, September 17, 2016

Cheney said the comments broke his latest heart (Colin's emails)



We have Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump on the show tonight, which means security is very tight. On their way in, everyone in the audience had to put their keys into a tray and their deplorables into a basket. –Jimmy Fallon
It’s been a busy week for Trump. Earlier today, he appeared on “Dr. Oz” and said that he wants to lose about 15 pounds. And his barber said, “Hey, come by any time you like!” –Jimmy Fallon
Everybody’s talking about these leaked emails from former Secretary of State Colin Powell. In one, he actually called Dick Cheney an idiot. Cheney was very hurt. In fact, he said the comments broke his latest heart. –Jimmy Fallon