Usually when I pay a person to like me, it's my wife (Rolled it himself)

At his campaign launch, Donald Trump apparently paid extras $50 to cheer for him at the rally. Trump said, "Usually when I pay a person to like me, it's my wife." –Conan O’Brien

Yesterday on Father’s Day my kids gave me breakfast in bed, which I thought was sweet. My nine-year-old makes a mean mojito. Brought me a cigarette too. Rolled it himself. –Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

In a related story, his new rap album drops on Wednesday (Rolled it himself)

Newly leaked emails from Sony Pictures show there was an agreement between executives to keep Spider-Man white and straight. However, in order to please the gay community "The Fantastic Four" will now be "The Fabulous Four." –Conan O’Brien

Fourteen paintings by Adolf Hitler were sold at auction in Germany. After the auction the surprised buyer said, "Wait a second, it's THAT Adolf Hitler?" –Conan O’Brien

On a podcast the other day, President Obama used the N-word. In a related story, his new rap album drops on Wednesday. –Conan O’Brien

Yesterday on Father’s Day my kids gave me breakfast in bed, which I thought was sweet. My nine-year-old makes a mean mojito. Brought me a cigarette too. Rolled it himself. –Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Wait a second, it's THAT Adolf Hitler? (Rolled it himself)

Fourteen paintings by Adolf Hitler were sold at auction in Germany. After the auction the surprised buyer said, "Wait a second, it's THAT Adolf Hitler?" –Conan O’Brien

Yesterday on Father’s Day my kids gave me breakfast in bed, which I thought was sweet. My nine-year-old makes a mean mojito. Brought me a cigarette too. Rolled it himself. –Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It's in the chapter Things I Have in Common with Conan O'Brien. (Brought me a cigarette too. Rolled it himself)

Yesterday on Father’s Day my kids gave me breakfast in bed, which I thought was sweet. My nine-year-old makes a mean mojito. Brought me a cigarette too. Rolled it himself. –Conan O’Brien

At the World Cup, Uruguay's Luis Suarez bit a player from Italy's team. It's the third time he's done it. The last time he bit a Chinese player and then claimed he was hungry an hour later.--Conan O'Brien

South Carolina and Mississippi are on the verge of taking down their state Capitol's Confederate flag. Here's the surprising part. They're doing it just because Taylor Swift told them to. –Conan O’Brien

"Bristol Palin's new book says she lost her virginity on a night when she had too many wine coolers. It's in the chapter 'Things I Have in Common with Conan O'Brien.'" –Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”