400 selfies of a bear is also known as a Grindr profile (My dad's a bald eagle and my mom's a Big Mac)

February 2023

A genetic engineering company has announced plans to bring back the long extinct Dodo bird, but only for a limited time at Arby’s. —Colin Jost

Police officials in Colorado say that a bear discovered a wildlife camera in the woods and posed for more than 400 selfies. 400 selfies of a bear is also known as a Grindr profile. —Colin Jost

For the first time ever, two brothers will be facing off against each other in the Super Bowl. Incidentally two brothers in the Super Bowl is why my grandfather won’t be watching. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

once they fish them out of the White House septic tank (Protect Julian)

February 2022

“Donald Trump responded on Tuesday to being dropped by his longtime accounting firm Mazars USA with a four-page statement, writing, among other things, that the Trump brand is worth more than he previously claimed. Trump wrote at length: ‘We have a great company with fantastic assets that are unique, extremely valuable and, in many cases, far more valuable than what was listed in our financial statements.’ Only Donald Trump would defend himself against charges that he overvalued his assets by re-overvaluing his assets.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Joe Biden, meanwhile, ordered the release of Trump’s White House visitor logs once they fish them out of the White House septic tank.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Trump’s been trying to block the House committee from trying to see this list, claiming executive privilege. I feel like the only thing we’re going to learn from the list is how often he ordered Arby’s on Uber Eats or something.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/02/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”