Man, I’m not good at a lot of things vs Now I’m good at everything! (a magical place that becomes less comfortable over time)

There is a store in my neighborhood called Futon World. I love that name Futon World. It makes me think of a magical place that becomes less comfortable over time. --Demetri Martin

I was on the train and I heard this guy say to his friend, “Man I'm really good at checkers.” Which is the same as saying, “Man, I’m not good at a lot of things.” --Demetri Martin

My computer beat me a chess but then I beat him at kickboxing. --Demetri Martin

I used to compete in sports a lot but then I realized that you can buy trophies. Now I’m good at everything. --Demetri Martin

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”