I have the oldest typewriter in the entire world. It types in pencil (Broken System)

I had a dream that all the babies prevented by the pill showed up. They were mad. --Steven Wright

I was caesarean born. You can't really tell. Although whenever I leave a house I go out through the window. --Steven Wright

I called the wrong number today I said hello is joey there and a woman answered she said yes yes he is. I said can I speak to him please. She said no he can't talk right now he’s only two months old. I said all right, I’ll wait. --Steven Wright

I finally went to the eye doctor. I got contacts, but I only need them when I read. So I got flip ups. I keep them on my desk right next to my typewriter. I have the oldest typewriter in the entire world. It types in pencil. --Steven Wright

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”