On White House press
secretary Tony Snow classifying civilian casualties as a lamentable side effect
of war: "It's not murder, it's a lamentable side effect. The upset stomach
and diarrhea of freedom, if you will." --Jon Stewart
"President Bush said
he liked Austria, but he said he got a little annoyed with everyone doing the
Arnold impressions all the time." --Jay Leno
"In Colorado, the
president of Coors Beer, Pete Coors, who lost the race for U.S. Senate a while
back, was arrested for drunk driving back in May. I can't believe he didn't win
the Senate race. You get busted for drunk driving, you try to cover it up. He's
obviously qualified to be senator." --Jay Leno
"North Korea is
reportedly trying to develop a missile that can reach the West Coast of the
United States. Apparently, the Korean missile will land in California and open
up a nail salon." --Conan O'Brien
