it’s hard to find a jury of his peers the same day there’s a Renaissance fair (lift the keys off a guard’s belt)

November 2021

“Jacob Chansley, better known as the QAnon Shaman, was sentenced to 41 months for his role in the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol. He apologized for storming the Capitol and said he often looks in the mirror and tells himself, ‘You really messed up, royally.’ Maybe if he’d taken a look in the mirror sooner, he would have noticed he had a dead raccoon on his head.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“That’s nearly three and a half years, so with good behavior, he could be out in time to storm the Capitol in 2024.” —Stephen Colbert

“Not only did Chansley commit the crime of looking like an idiot — he is one.” —Stephen Colbert

“Right now, he’s trying to use an antler to lift the keys off a guard’s belt.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Apparently, it’s hard to find a jury of his peers the same day there’s a Renaissance fair.” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

It almost makes too much sense (That awkward moment)

November 2021

After three giraffes died at a Dallas zoo in less than a month, officials are investigating if the deaths are connected. Some are beginning to suspect that this is the work of notorious serial killer Girrafrey Dahmer. —Colin Jost

A man has come up with a new chicken wing delivery service that will use Jet skis to offer boat-side chicken service. The man said he came up with the idea with help from his long time business partner, cocaine. —Colin Jost

Prosectors have asked the judge to send Jacob Chansley, the January 6th insurgent known as the QAnon Shamen, to 51 months in prison. They chose that because 5 plus 1 equals 6. 666 is the mark of The Beast. 6 plus 6 plus 6 is 18 minus 1, for one nation under God, equals 17 and the 17th letter of the alphabet is, say it with me, Q. It almost makes too much sense. —Colin Jost

Elon Musk sold nearly $5 Billion in Tesla stock after he polled his followers on Twitter and they told him to do it. Which is good news because the polls other option was kill a drifter. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

after which he will be remanded into the custody of Dancing With the Stars (The Shaman-Shank Redemption)

November 2021

“Jacob Chansley, the infamous insurrectionist known as the QAnon Shaman who took part in the Capitol attack on Jan. 6, is probably not gonna be storming anything any time soon. This week, prosecutors suggested that Chansley be sentenced to more than four years in prison for his role in the incursion, which would be the most severe punishment yet for a participant. Prosecutors are recommending 51 months behind bars, after which he will be remanded into the custody of ‘Dancing With the Stars.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Weird to think the QAnon Shaman could get four years in prison when the guy who encouraged him to do it could get four more years in the White House.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“And also, can we stop calling him a shaman now? I mean, that would make half the fans at the Buffalo Bills game shamans too.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“I support a four-year prison sentence for any adult wearing a costume.” —James Corden

“They’re asking for three years for the riot, and an extra year because he used to be in an improv group.” —James Corden

“He may be going to prison for years. Even worse, they’re also making a movie about all of this: ‘The Shaman-Shank Redemption.’” —James Corden

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”