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Showing posts with label Carly Rae Jepsen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Carly Rae Jepsen. Show all posts

Monday, August 28, 2023

I found there was, within me, an invincible love (If I die, maybe I’ll get to meet Prince)


“These are the five stages of coronavirus. First, you have denial: ‘I’m not going to get the coronavirus. Only old people, Chinese people, and people on cruise ships get that.’ Second, anger: ‘Why isn’t there any toilet paper at Target? Is everybody nuts?’ Then bargaining: ‘All right, there’s no Purell. Maybe I’ll make my own hand sanitizer with Jergens and vodka.’ But next comes depression: ‘I can’t believe they canceled Coachella. I’m not gonna get to see Carly Rae Jepsen for a year now!’ And finally, acceptance, which is ‘Hey, you know what? If I die, maybe I’ll get to meet Prince.’” —Jimmy Kimmel


On Saturday ABC News hosted the eighth Republican debate and the big moment was in the beginning, when Ben Carson didn't come out because he couldn't hear his name when he was introduced. It's OK, Ben, we know you're not supposed to wake a sleepwalker. –Jimmy Kimmel


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Thursday, March 12, 2020

the wall would help – to protect them from us (If I die, maybe I’ll get to meet Prince)


“The White House says they have everything under control, which must be why they delayed the release of a report from the director of national intelligence that says the United States is not prepared to handle a pandemic. One possible reason why we might not be prepared is back in 2018, Trump fired the entire US pandemic response team to save money. But don’t worry, he has a plan. On Tuesday morning, Trump commented ‘we need the wall more than ever’ on a retweet of someone who argued The Wall could save America from coronavirus. There are more than 1,000 confirmed coronavirus cases in America and fewer than 10 in Mexico. So, he’s right, the wall would help – to protect them from us.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“These are the five stages of coronavirus. First, you have denial: ‘I’m not going to get the coronavirus. Only old people, Chinese people, and people on cruise ships get that.’ Second, anger: ‘Why isn’t there any toilet paper at Target? Is everybody nuts?’ Then bargaining: ‘All right, there’s no Purell. Maybe I’ll make my own hand sanitizer with Jergens and vodka.’ But next comes depression: ‘I can’t believe they canceled Coachella. I’m not gonna get to see Carly Rae Jepsen for a year now!’ And finally, acceptance, which is ‘Hey, you know what? If I die, maybe I’ll get to meet Prince.’” —Jimmy Kimmel

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”