I want to tell you, occasions don't get more rare than that, ladies and gentlemen (a real manicure)

"Talking about presidents who smoked. You remember George W. Bush? Remember him? He's saying while he was president he would enjoy the occasional cigar. On a rare occasion, he would have a cigar because he said it helped him think. I want to tell you, occasions don't get more rare than that, ladies and gentlemen." –David Letterman

“Mitt Romney won in Michigan last night. It was certainly a close race — a real nail-biter or, in Romney's case, a real manicure.” –David Letterman

"Congratulations to Chelsea Clinton. Over the weekend, she gave birth to a baby girl. The baby girl will not confirm or deny whether she's running in 2056." –David Letterman

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Doctors say his tail will grow back in no time (he's more like Bill)

James Carville made a video letting everyone know he's recovering from surgery. Doctors say his tail will grow back in no time. —Greg Gutfeld 

And finally, a portrait of President Trump made of horse poop has sold for $1,800 in Canada. Not to be outdone, Joe Biden's poop made into a horse sold for $18,000. —Greg Gutfeld  

CNN compared Abdul El-Sayed to Hillary Clinton. In reality, he's more like Bill since they both dream about being with 72 virgins. —Greg Gutfeld 

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”