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Thursday, February 2, 2017

JOKES: How could Trump blow the honeymoon? He’s had three of them.



Trump’s SCOTUS nominee is federal judge Neil Gorsuch! No surprise he chose him. He is a strict constitutional originalist. That means he rules only as the Founding Fathers intended in cases like “Marbury v. Electricity Is the Devil’s Magic” and “The People v. Slavery Is Cool, Right?” –Stephen Colbert
We’re just 10 days in and it feels like it’s total chaos at the White House. This is supposed to be the honeymoon. How could Trump blow the honeymoon? He’s had three of them. –Stephen Colbert
Right or wrong, Trump’s immigration ban has been a PR disaster, with heartbreaking stories like the 5-year-old boy who was detained for more than four hours and reportedly handcuffed. AND he’s a U.S. citizen! –Stephen Colbert
Now this sounds bad, but yesterday White House press secretary Sean Spicer defended the detainment [plays clip of Spicer]: “To assume that just because of someone’s age, or gender, or whatever, that they don’t pose a threat would be misguided and wrong.” Yeah, NOT handcuffing a child is a security risk. We all know kids go through stages — you’ve got the terrible twos, the fatwa fives, it’s absolutely terrifying. –Stephen Colbert



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