This is like if a mental patient escaped the hospital and wandered into an air traffic control tower (a long, stress-free life)

We have been waiting for disgraced congressman George Santos to be voted out of Congress all week and as of Thursday evening, we are still waiting. Why this has taken so long, I have no idea. This is like if a mental patient escaped the hospital and wandered into an air traffic control tower and then a year later he was still up there landing planes. —Jimmy Kimmel

Henry Kissinger’s death at 100 just goes to show you that if you have zero morals, you’ll lead a long, stress-free life. He committed massacres and lived to be 100, while the rest of us over here are dying at 47 because we can’t stop stressing about the time we waved to a person who was actually waving to someone behind us. —Michelle Wolf, The Daily Show

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Scientists just named a newly discovered beetle after Leonardo DiCaprio (fanning himself with hush money)

Scientists just named a newly discovered beetle after Leonardo DiCaprio. Unfortunately, it froze in the ocean after the beetle’s girlfriend wouldn’t share part of a leaf — even though there was CLEARLY room on the leaf for both of them. --Jimmy Fallon

It was almost 90 degrees in New York City today! It was so hot, President Trump’s lawyer spent the day fanning himself with hush money. --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

So you can see why Trump was upset (she's stealing his act)

Saturday night was the annual White House Correspondents' Dinner and once again, President Trump did not attend. And today he seemed to be upset about the jokes directed at his staff, because this morning he tweeted, "The White House Correspondents' Dinner is dead." Then again, can you call anything that's only televised on C-SPAN alive? --James Corden

Comedian Michelle Wolf hosted the dinner, did the most amazing job. During the dinner, she mocked journalists and politicians. So you can see why Trump was upset — she's stealing his act. --James Corden

Trump skipped the correspondents dinner on Saturday night, and instead hosted a rally in Michigan. Trump said he'd rather be around people who loved him, so he went to Michigan and left behind the White House press corps and Melania. --James Corden

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”