Whoever pairs this with a pizza delivery app probably will get the Nobel Prize (He's usually so low-key)

"Congress is about to head off on their August recess, which seems appropriate. Adults go on vacation, children go on recess." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Right now, available only in San Francisco, is an app where you can get marijuana delivered right to your door. Whoever pairs this with a pizza delivery app probably will get the Nobel Prize." –Jimmy Kimmel

According to multiple reports, Donald Trump's campaign staff is becoming extremely frustrated by his behavior and his unwillingness to stay on message during the campaign. I don't blame them — who could have ever guessed he would do something like this? He's usually so low-key. –Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

They describe the man as a staunch Republican who has never heard of bumper stickers (bread and circuses)

"Everybody's mind is on Hurricane Sandy. The worst is over.

Now people are discussing the cause. Sources say that it was

partly caused by global warming. Meanwhile, Fox News said

it was caused by two men kissing in Central Park."

–Conan O'Brien

"A man in Indiana got a tattoo of Mitt Romney's campaign logo on his face. They describe the man as a staunch Republican who has never heard of bumper stickers." –Conan O'Brien

"The hurricane has interrupted the presidential campaign. Both presidential candidates are taking measures to prepare for Hurricane Sandy. President Obama is staying in Washington to coordinate relief efforts. And Mitt Romney is moving his smaller homes into his larger home." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”