A man in California was arrested after he went to a Planet Fitness, took off his clothes and threatened people with a knife. Which to be fair is the only way Planet Fitness lets you cancel your membership. —Colin Jost
A 99 year old woman in Canada broke three swimming records for her class in one day until finally, someone noticed she had fallen in. —Colin Jost
After the New Hampshire primary, Nikki Haley attacked Donald Trump and called out his, quote, ‘senior moments’, which made Trump so angry, he almost ripped off the safety rails on his toilet. —Michael Che
President Biden is planning to send the director of the CIA to broker a deal between Israel and Hamas, because no one eases tensions in the Middle East quite like the CIA. —Michael Che
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
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