Where do you see yourself exploding in the next five years? (The Great Wall of Chimichanga)

"The United States Senate today took some steps to keep illegal immigrants out of our 'American Idol' competitions. They voted to build a 370-mile long fence along the border between the U.S. and Mexico. They also announced that they're going to hire illegal immigrant workers to build it. The Senators voted overwhelmingly for the fence. As I said, it is 370 miles long. Unfortunately, the actual border with Mexico is more than 2,000 miles long. So, I guess the message is 'go around.' Tentatively, they're calling it 'The Great Wall of Chimichanga.'" --Jimmy Kimmel

"Obviously, they're keeping the less popular Republicans out of the spotlight. President Bush gave a speech last night which couldn't have been more than five minutes long. Dick Cheney is in Azerbaijan, which I think is the farthest possible point from Minneapolis on the globe, and they actually locked Senator Larry Craig in the convention center men's room. Either that or he locked himself in, I'm not sure." --Jimmy Kimmel

 

The government released hundreds of documents seized from Osama bin Laden's compound. Among the items is a job application for al-Qaida. It's like a regular job application except it asks questions like, "Where do you see yourself exploding in the next five years?"—Jimmy Kimmel

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”