I’m picturing rich couples using other people as furniture (the wedgies will be gluten-free)

August 2021

“The infrastructure bill includes funding to eliminate Amtrak’s maintenance backlog and modernize the north-east corridor line so north-east commuters will have beautiful new seats for Rangers fans to puke on, as well as provisions for electric school buses. And to make it even more environmentally friendly, the bullies will shoot spitballs at you with paper straws, and the wedgies will be gluten-free.” —Stephen Colbert

“The Senate also approved a $3.5 Trillion budget plan that would expand healthcare, provide free preschool and community college, and fund climate change programs. The measure was approved after a rapid-fire series of votes called a ‘vote-a-rama’ that lasted more than 14 hours; some Senators even brought extra padding for their chairs to make the time more comfortable. The chairs were padded with only the softest material – cotton, goose down, Ted Cruz’s spine.” —Stephen Colbert

“The Senate also approved Biden’s $3.5 Trillion budget plan to expand social services, healthcare and climate change programs. That’s giant. Biden’s spending money like his Gap rewards just kicked in. Biden calls it the Human Infrastructure Plan – not really crazy about the term ‘human infrastructure’. I’m picturing rich couples using other people as furniture.” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”