Fortunately you can fool enough of the people enough of the time (The sky is rigged)

Donald Trump’s inaugural committee is actually encouraging protesters to show up on Friday, saying, quote, “We’ll give you cookies and Kool-Aid.” Then Republicans in Congress were like, “Actually, we drank all the Kool-Aid.” –Jimmy Fallon

It’s expected to rain in Washington during Donald Trump’s inauguration. In response, Donald Trump tweeted, “The sky is rigged.” –Conan O’Brien

It’s rumored that Donald Trump’s transition team is paying seat fillers to attend his inauguration. Just a word of advice to the Trump seat-fillers: Make sure you get paid up front, OK? Get the cash. –Conan O’Brien