JOKES: he turned the hooker-strewn 42nd street into an ESPN Zone

"Unfortunately for Giuliani, there are apparently other people in Florida who were less impressed by how he turned the hooker-strewn 42nd street into an ESPN Zone." --Jon Stewart

"Giuliani did not officially drop out until 6 pm eastern or 11 past 9 Giuliani standard time this evening. Although last night's winner unofficially dropped him out during his victory speech [on screen: John McCain saying, 'I want to thank my dear friend. My dear friend Rudy Giuliani. He invested his heart and soul in this primary and who conducted himself with all the qualities of the exceptional American leader he truly is. Thank you, Rudy']. Did Rudy Giuliani die?" --Jon Stewart

"How sad really that Edwards is out of the race, because he had a stirring message that really reached people about two Americas. It is so true, there were two Americas. One in which people were voting for Edwards because they were afraid of Hillary, and another America where people were voting for Edwards because they were afraid of Barack Obama." --Stephen Colbert