So my soulmate is out there (He got 2.5 billion hits!)

October 2013

"According to a new report, more than 700 fake Obamacare websites have been created. Security experts say it's simple to identify the phony sites because they are easy to log on to." –Jay Leno

"The White House said today that one of the reasons the Obamacare website has had so many problems is because it's so popular that it was overwhelmed. Really? How come Psy's 'Gangnam Style' video never had any problems? He got 2.5 billion hits!" –Jay Leno

"Have you tried to log on to the Obamacare website? It's slow. It is slower than my watch during an interview with Paris Hilton." –Jay Leno

"The Obamacare website is not the only one crashing. The NSA website went offline Friday after suspected hackers broke into it. Hey, NSA: It's not so much fun when people are sneaking into YOUR computer, is it?" –Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Now they're really asking for it (at least it's not Trump)

April 2013

"On Tuesday at the White House, President Obama sang with Justin Timberlake. It's being called the blackest thing President Obama has ever done." –Conan O'Brien

"Donald Trump is going to be a grandfather. It's true. That thing on his head is pregnant." –Craig Ferguson

"The South Korean pop star Psy of 'Gangnam Style' fame just announced that he'll release a new song tomorrow. As soon as they heard, North Korea said, 'Now they're really asking for it.'" –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

The zoo is pretty cool, but I've heard you won't be able to see the seals until it's too late (Treat Yourself, You Deserve It)

February 2013

"People are still trying to figure out why the power went out Sunday at the Super Bowl. Today they found out the reason. Turns out China cut off the electricity for nonpayment of our bill." –Jay Leno

"The White House is warning North Korea that it will face significant consequences if it moves forward with a new round of nuclear tests. Not only that — it's also warning South Korea that it will face serious consequences if Psy makes another ad for pistachios." –Jimmy Fallon

"Pakistan is opening an amusement park and a zoo in the same town where the raid on Osama Bin Laden took place. The zoo is pretty cool, but I've heard you won't be able to see the seals until it's too late." –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”