Or, and hear me out, flamingos look like other flamingos (past marijuana use)

April 2022

U.S. officials are concerned that Vladimir Putin is keeping military units positioned near Kyiv despite earlier promises to withdraw. Putin’s failure to pull out has earned him the nickname Nick Cannon. —Michael Che

According to a new study, men who eat too much meat are raising the risk of becoming infertile. On the other hand, Donald Trump has five kids that we know of. —Michael Che

Wildlife officials say that a flamingo that escaped from a Kansas zoo 17 years ago has been spotted in Texas. Or, and hear me out, flamingos look like other flamingos. —Michael Che

In a recent interview, Tyler Perry revealed that he has used his Madea voice while having sex. Damn. Dude must like sex dry as hell. —Michael Che

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

No father-in-law wants to act the fool in front of the man who’s banging his daughter, you know? (That’s all of European history!)

February 2022

“Vladimir Putin is threatening to ‘activate’ his nuclear arsenal over the weekend. You see, people? This is why every crazy world leader needs a pasty son-in-law by his side – keeps them in check. Because no father-in-law wants to act the fool in front of the man who’s banging his daughter, you know?” —Trevor Noah

“Coverage of the war in Ukraine has consumed the vast majority of TV news, and beyond the war, there’s a really interesting thing that I learned. And that is: a lot of people on TV didn’t expect a war like this to happen in, let’s say, ‘certain neighborhoods’. Said one CBS correspondent in Kyiv: ‘This isn’t a place, with all due respect, like Iraq or Afghanistan … this is a relatively civilized, relatively European – I have to choose those words carefully, too – city where you wouldn’t expect that or hope that it’s going to happen.’ Wow, that was you choosing your words carefully? So what were you going to say if you weren’t choosing your words carefully? ‘I just hope the next time this happens, it happens back in the Middle East where it belongs.’ Racism aside – and that’s a big aside, such remarks showed a blatant ignorance of history. You do realize that until very recently, fighting crazy wars was Europe’s thing. That was Europe’s entire thing! That’s all of European history!” —Trevor Noah

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”