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Tuesday, May 12, 2020

That dude has always given off major bitten-by-a-bat vibes (Oxygen is the devil’s gas)


“And I won’t lie — I’m not surprised that this coronavirus outbreak started in Stephen Miller’s house. That dude has always given off major bitten-by-a-bat vibes.” —Trevor Noah

“The White House announced yesterday that despite one of Vice President Mike Pence’s senior staff testing positive for the coronavirus, Pence will not isolate himself. But in his defense, you can’t catch it if you never breathe. [imitating Mike Pence] ‘No, no thank you. Oxygen is the devil’s gas.’” —Seth Meyers

“In a new interview, a White House senior adviser said it was, quote, ‘scary’ to go to work after two fellow staffers tested positive last week for the coronavirus. Said the adviser, ‘Before this, it was just embarrassing.’” —Seth Meyers

“The coronavirus is now officially in the White House, and that’s scary. Although if it’s like everything else that lands in the White House, it won’t last more than a few weeks.” —Trevor Noah

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

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