“Just after Trump bragged about his super wall, we learned that smugglers have been cutting through the new border wall with basic tools that you can buy at any hardware store. And I wouldn’t be shocked if the guys at Home Depot showed the smugglers how to do it because — because those guys will help you with any project. Yeah, they don’t judge.” --Trevor Noah
“For four years, this guy told us this wall would be impenetrable. But now he’s like, ‘Of course you can cut through anything.’ In a span of a few hours, the wall went from Dwayne ‘the Rock’ Johnson to literally any other guy named Dwayne.” --Trevor Noah
“[imitating Trump] You’ve got to have a see-through wall because if the wall is not see-through, the only way to know what’s on the other side is by yelling ‘Marco’ and hope they yell ‘Polo.’ That’s the only way. But some Mexicans aren’t named Marco. A lot of people don’t know that, folks.” --Trevor Noah
“And also, if Trump is saying he built it on purpose to be something that’s easy to open and then close, it isn’t a wall. My man, you’ve built a door.” --Trevor Noah
“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
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