Usually you're married a lot longer than that before you hear a gunshot (chopped nuts)

A couple in Ohio yesterday ran a half marathon immediately after getting married at the starting line. Ha, usually you're married a lot longer than that before you hear a gunshot. –Seth Meyers

Finally, a bakery in Tennessee has started selling cakes to celebrate successful vasectomy operations. And this is insensitive -- it has chopped nuts. --Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”