Finally! A place where we can eat a sandwich! (Still not the clumsiest attempt to get to second base)

A former “Apprentice” contestant says that Donald Trump didn’t know the names of all the women on the show, and would describe them by their bodies and looks. When asked about it, Trump said, “Which woman said that? Brown Hair/Lazy Eye or Blond Hair/Nose Job?” –Jimmy Fallon

The president just signed a law that will require men’s restrooms in federal buildings to have baby-changing tables. Or as most guys will call that, “Finally! A place where we can eat a sandwich!” –Jimmy Fallon

Samsung is sending out thermally insulated “flameproof” boxes for people returning its exploding Galaxy Note 7 phones. Samsung says they’re being “extra cautious,” while UPS is saying, “Please use FedEx.” –Jimmy Fallon

Tonight was game three between the Mets and Dodgers right here at CitiField! But the big story is from Saturday, when Dodgers player Chase Utley slid into second base and injured Rubén Tejada from the Mets. Or as my prom date called it, “Still not the clumsiest attempt to get to second base.” –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”