God help us if Iran ever develops the wet willy (President Jethro)

"Last week, presidential candidate Mitt Romney called himself a lifelong hunter. Turns out he's only hunted twice in his life. And, of course, both of those times were for Easter eggs. He said he hunts only small animals, like Jed Clampett did. Comparing himself to Jed Clampett? Is that a good idea? Anybody gonna want to vote for President Jed Clampett, especially after eight years of President Jethro?" --Jay Leno

"I'm going to talk about these 15 British soldiers captured, tagged and then released by Iran. Some in England aren't giving these sailors a hero's welcome. Apparently, playing ping pong in captivity doesn't qualify as keeping a stiff upper lip. Sailor Arthur Bachelor reportedly 'cried himself to sleep after one guard kept flicking my neck with his index finger and thumb.' Ohh, his index finger and thumb? God help us if Iran ever develops the wet willy." --Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”