It just came out that Trump’s secretary of state, Rex Tillerson, was on the toilet when he found out Trump fired him on Twitter. Then Trump said, “Wow, what a coincidence — I was on the toilet when I tweeted that.” --Jimmy Fallon
That’s right, Tillerson was on the toilet when he was fired. Which explains why Jeff Sessions and Betsy DeVos haven’t used a bathroom in six months. --Jimmy Fallon
The Russian presidential election was this weekend, and to get people to vote, Russian officials were offering prizes like Apple Watches. It sounds fun — until you open the box with your Apple Watch, and it’s still attached to a hand. --Jimmy Fallon
A magisterial collection.
An emotional roller coaster.
Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s
Last Night On Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.
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