"Congress
is holding hearings on baseball and steroids. Congress is committed to removing
performance-enhancing drugs from baseball. You know, I got a better idea. Why
don't we get performance-enhancing drugs out of baseball and give them to
Congress? What is their approval rate? 13%? Maybe it would help." --Jay
Leno
"President Bush says if John McCain is the
Republican nominee, he will campaign for him. Well, you can't do better than
that." --David Letterman
"How
about Mitt Romney,
you know, he resigned. He dropped out of the campaign. He put it on hold. He
suspended his campaign, that is the word, he suspended his campaign. A lot of
you folks are worried about Mitt. Don't worry about Mitt. He has already gone
back to playing Trevor St. John on 'One Life To Live.'" --David Letterman
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