What do we say if the public finds out we just made all this stuff up?

That’s right, there’s exactly one week until Election Day, and this is probably a bad sign, but that’s where the calendar just stops. –Seth Meyers

Ted Cruz posted a photo on Twitter last night of himself dressed as the Phantom of the Opera for Halloween. Said trick-or-treaters, “Aggh! We can still see half your face!” –Seth Meyers

The 2016 presidential election is in exactly one week! One weak Republican, and one weak Democrat. –Seth Meyers