"Rand
Paul, the senator from Kentucky, keeps getting into trouble. They say he
actually plagiarized an entire section of his 2012 book, 'Government Bullies.'
When asked for comment, Paul said, 'It was the best of times, it was the worst
of times.'" –Jimmy Fallon
"There's now growing concern in Iran about the health of
74-year-old Ayatollah Khamenei, the country's supreme leader. He has a chronic
illness. You think healthcare is bad in this country, try seeing a doctor under
Ayatollah-Care. See how that works." –Jay Leno
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