Why are you being so polite? (Now we'll never be able to screw that light bulb in)

Spencer Pratt revealed that if he's elected, he will turn the 19 room mayor's mansion into housing for single mothers. After hearing this, Bill Clinton volunteered to be in his cabinet. —Tom Shillue

Poland was alarmed by reports the Pentagon may cancel plans to deploy 4,000 troops there. A Polish spokesman said, "Now we'll never be able to screw that light bulb in.” —Tom Shillue

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”