“We had been anticipating the next January 6th hearing on Wednesday, but the House select committee postponed it as Hurricane Ian barreled towards Florida. We hope everybody in Florida stays safe. Please, if you can, get out of the storm’s path. Worst-case scenario, tell Ron DeSantis you’re Venezuelan, maybe he gives you a free plane ride to Martha’s Vineyard.” —Stephen Colbert
“In international news, Putin’s war in Ukraine has been going so badly that the Russian leader ordered a draft, prompting many Russians to flee. Those who haven’t been able to leave have called hotlines to ask how to surrender. I get why they want to pre-emptively surrender, look at this video of a group of Russian soldiers instructed to bring tampons to the frontlines to stuff into bullet wounds. Tampons to plug gunshot wounds? That is awful. Plus, so awkward to ask for.” —Stephen Colbert
“And Buckingham Palace released King Charles III’s official monogram design. Take that, people who say the monarchy is an outdated institution that does nothing! They. Release. Monograms.” —Stephen Colbert
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
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