Lord, please help me accept the things I cannot change, which is everything (as powerful as a negative Yelp review)

March 2014

"Pope Francis and President Obama met for the first time today and prayed together. Said Obama: 'Lord, please help me accept the things I cannot change, which is everything.'" –Seth Meyers 

"Today the U.N. approved a resolution calling Russia's annexation of Crimea illegal. For those of you who don't know what a U.N. resolution is, it's about as powerful as a negative Yelp review." –Seth Meyers 

"After discovering a new dwarf planet orbiting the sun beyond Pluto, scientists have named it '2012 VP113' or 'Biden' for short. Scientists say they chose the name because the planet, like Biden, is pretty far out there." –Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”