So I'm counting on the new mayor to restore it to its former glory (It was the best of times, it was the worst of times)

November 2013

"In New York they elected a new mayor. He is Bill de Blasio, the first Democrat mayor in 20 years. Now 20 years ago Times Square was filled with strip clubs and porno theaters. So I'm counting on the new mayor to restore it to its former glory." –Craig Ferguson

"In New Jersey, they re-elected Chris Christie by a HUGE margin. Is there any other way?" –Craig Ferguson

"There's now growing concern in Iran about the health of 74-year-old Ayatollah Khamenei, the country's supreme leader. He has a chronic illness. You think healthcare is bad in this country, try seeing a doctor under Ayatollah-Care. See how that works." –Jay Leno

"The White House announced that Joe Biden will travel to Asia to make up for President Obama's trip that was canceled because of the government shutdown. Seriously? That's like Justin Timberlake canceling a show and sending the banjo players from those Geico ads to take his place." –Jimmy Fallon

"Rand Paul, the senator from Kentucky, keeps getting into trouble. They say he actually plagiarized an entire section of his 2012 book, 'Government Bullies.' When asked for comment, Paul said, 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.'" –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”