That’s an embarrassing way to admit you’ve never heard of lightning (Billy Joel's Alibi)

January 2021

“House Republicans assigned Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia to the Education and Labor Committee this week. Oh, come on! The lady who denies school shootings is in charge of the schools? Why not just appoint Surgeon General Joe Camel? ‘Warning: Smoking can make you dangerously cool.’” —Stephen Colbert

“In the midst of the devastating California wildfires of 2018, Marjorie Taylor Greene went on Facebook and claimed that the real and hidden culprit behind the fire was a laser from space triggered by some nefarious group of people. Who started the fire? So far, the only person we can rule out is Billy Joel — he’s got an airtight alibi.” —Stephen Colbert

“But claims like these require proof, right? Well, here’s Margie’s evidence: ‘Oddly, there are all these people who have said they saw what looked like lasers or blue beams of light causing the fires.’ That’s an embarrassing way to admit you’ve never heard of lightning.” —Stephen Colbert

“’And then the socialist lizard men shot jagged laser things out of the cloud. And that angered the sky so much it went ‘Roar!’ and the sky wept, and then, thanks to QAnon, the sky stopped crying and a rainbow appeared. And we shot it with our guns because rainbows are gay. The defense rests.’” —Stephen Colbert

“So where do these fictional space lasers come from? Well, according to Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene, it could have been a beam from ‘space solar generators.’ A ‘space solar generator.’ So, the sun?” —Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”