"Have
you noticed all these action stars are now endorsing candidates? Like Mike
Huckabee has Chuck Norris; Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger
came out for John McCain;
and today, Hillary
Clinton picked up Janet Reno." --Jay Leno
"Both the Republicans and the
Democrats have competing growth packages. Let me tell you something, the only
person with a growth package in this country that works -- Barry Bonds."
--Jay Leno
"Happy Groundhog Day, ladies and
gentlemen! It's funny. Earlier today, down in Washington, DC, a confused President Bush pardoned a
turkey." --David Letterman
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